Navigating the workplace as a woman can feel like walking a tightrope. On one side, you’re expected to help everyone and be the ever-available team player; on the other, if you say no, you might be seen as uncooperative. It’s a real double bind—damned if you do and damned if you don’t. In my experience, sometimes the strongest career move is simply choosing to say “no.” When you decline tasks that aren’t part of your core role, you send a powerful message: your time is valuable, and your focus should be on the work that truly matters.
In this article, we’ll explore why over-helpfulness can hold you back, how it might unintentionally devalue your expertise, and practical, friendly advice on setting boundaries while maintaining positive relationships at work.
“Hey, can you print this off for me and bring it to my desk?”
I once overheard this being asked of a junior colleague who, already swamped with her own tasks, immediately agreed even though the request was outside of her responsibilities.
She wantsed to be seen as cooperative and team-oriented. But by saying yes, she unknowingly set herself up for an endless stream of similar requests. Over time, she became the default person for tasks outside her responsibilities, at the expense of her own projects.
Research shows that women often find themselves caught in a double bind. Men are frequently praised for stepping up, while women who do the same are sometimes taken for granted or even criticised. When a man declines a request, he’s seen as busy and focused; when a woman does, she might be labeled as uncooperative or selfish. Recognising this double standard is the first step in reclaiming control over your time and energy.
Every minute you spend on tasks that aren’t truly yours is a minute taken away from the work you were hired to do. Constantly saying “yes” to extra requests can lead to:
While being known as helpful might feel like a compliment, it can also backfire:
Top leaders protect their time fiercely - they know that every moment counts. When you routinely say yes to every little request, you risk positioning yourself as someone who handles menial tasks rather than focusing on high-impact work. Protecting your time is about valuing your own skills and contributions.
Before you agree to any extra task, pause and consider:
It’s not about being unhelpful—it’s about taking care of yourself so you can truly shine. Here are some tips for setting boundaries while keeping things positive:
When your boss asks you to take on additional tasks, it can feel tricky, but remember—you’re worth protecting:
Your time is incredibly valuable, and every minute you spend on tasks that don’t align with your goals is a missed opportunity to advance your career. By learning to say “no” when needed, you’re not just protecting your schedule—you’re affirming your worth and ensuring that your work truly reflects your talents.
Remember, setting boundaries is a way to honour your own contributions while still being a supportive team member. It’s about balancing kindness with self-care so that you can continue to grow and excel in your career.
For more friendly advice and career tips on navigating the workplace as a woman, be sure to subscribe and join our community of empowered professionals who are all about lifting each other up.